Nicole W. Barnes Author

Well, the initial answer to this one is long… I’ve suffered with anxiety for many years now and it has just become a way of life.

Am I proud of that? No.

If I had to choose just one answer, I’d have to say the unknown makes me most anxious. What I mean by this is I don’t know what will happen when I make a big decision. For example, stepping back from a position I’ve been in for years. What will change in my life? How will it affect my family? What’s the next step? So many questions!

But then there’s more. My anxiety is also spiked by driving in high stress situations (interstate, storms, heavy traffic). My husband calls it an irrational fear.

Another “irrational fear” is when I worry about my kids. My anxiety spikes when they get hurt or sick. It rears it’s ugly head when the kids venture into new social situations. It even haunts me when my children are sleeping. Show of hands, how many of you check on your kids throughout the night?

I wish that I didn’t suffer from anxiety. The attacks are crippling at times. It can also put a strain on relationships due to the other person not relating to what’s wrong. (Hence the “irrational fear”.)

I haven’t always been this way. Life threw me quite a few curveballs that contributed to it. I’ve learned ways to manage the anxiety, but it will always be there in the back of my mind waiting to pounce.